She's JV to your varsity
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
