would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
