As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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