By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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