we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
