Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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