OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
