you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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