so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
