shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
