Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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