she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
