Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize