i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
