Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
