i may or may not be watching the land before time
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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