I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
