Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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