How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
