Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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