Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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