Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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