return my video game
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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