Pregnant stripper...not hot.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
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