i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize