No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
