Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Randomize