Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
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