This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
