what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize