you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
