She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Blood and glitter go together right?
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
