Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I understand Curling. That high.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Just high enough for therapy.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
