my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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