Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
