Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
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