forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
