she looked like the before picture.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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