Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
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