I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
