I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
