PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
