So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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