College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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