I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize