just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
