I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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