what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
