If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
