yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
