So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize
